Death & Dying

I thought I would write about death & dying, as I am experiencing the death of my grandfather. He had a massive heart attack this weekend and was sent to Harbor Hospice. Even though, I knew he had past heart problems and alzheimers, I really didn't realize that his death would be coming, until he doctor said he has maybe a week or so to live. She said he was in the dying process, as the blood tests showed this increased level of this one type of acid. Plus, the other tests verified it.

He has been at Hospice for 2 days now and I have sat with him and watched his breathing, his facial expressions, etc, and wonder what is going on in his head.

I read the little book that Hospice gave us that explains the dying process. It first talks about the losing interest in food. Then, it says the breathing gets heavier, along with periods of no breaths. But, one of the last things that is left before you are actually gone, is your hearing. It is amazing.

When you ask my grandfather how he is feeling, he says "feeling with both hands" which is something he always used to joke about.

He looks so at peace while sleeping. You don't actually think about death until you go through it with a loved one.

I wasn't able to be there when my grandmother passed away in 2000, as I was living in Chicago. So, being able to be here with my grandfather in his last days is extra special to me. It is also helping me to realize that death isn't scary, but full of peace.